Mostly Anecdotal

Have you ever imagined what it must be like when Bush calls his advisors in for a meeting. What he says, what they talk about. Think about it Senior adviser Karl Rove and press secretary Ari Fleischer get the call the president wants to talk. They walk in shake hands sit down and Bush says, what the hell is going on guys I’m getting crucified in the press, they say we are over stating the case of that bad guy we locked up you know the one with the dirty bum. That’s dirty bomb sir. Yes whatever, the one we put where he needs to be. They’re saying I’m violating Jose Padilla al Muhajir’s rights, an American citizen. Where the hell does that come from. Don’t they know, hell Rummy told me himself, we know he met with those Al Qaeda guys right, we know he was talking to them. We’re listening to him planning this shit. We could have bombed their asses right then, but were the nice guys protecting an American Citizen’s rights. We didn’t kill em we let him come home. And now they’re on my ass. I thought you guys spinned this, er spun it, I mean you were supposed to make me look good. Damn! And another thing, I announce the new cabinet department, homeland defense, you said it would distract from the FBI stuff and that Rowley rat. Now I find out that prick Tom Ridge was saying last week what a bad idea it was, how he thought it should be vetoed. How do you think that makes me look? And since were talking about Tom tell him to lose the shirts. I don’t think it’s a good idea him wearing different color shirts depending on what the terrorist risk is he looks like a dork. He scared the shit out of me the other day walking in with a red shirt on. I didn’t know if he was a commie or the terrorists had attacked again. The guy is colorblind and he designs a system that relies on colors. I’m getting tired of looking bad. And those damn Europeans don’t think I’m continental enough. You know that translation-speaking gadget we are giving our troops so they can speak to the natives. Get me one of those, that will teach that prick Jacques Chirac, I’ll be speaking like a native frogman, I mean froggie. I’ll be a goddamn polygut uh polyglot, fucking Europeans I’ll be so continental even those dumb shit reporters will like me. So what I’m saying is you got fix this shit. Quit making me look bad, or I’ll have to get me some new spinners. Yes sir, Thank you sir and the advisors leave. God that guy is dumber than a post. No Ari, you can sharpen a post he’s dumber than a box of rocks.

Tried to defend my cowboy like habits
Did it several times a day
Took my time defeating people asking for peace
Lined up John Ashcroft asked him to take them away.

But at night I have these wonderful dreams
Some kind of stupendous feat.
Not diplomacy, words, or U.N. meets
But a big bunker buster that’s really quite neat.

Ruling the world is paradise
Heaven on earth with weapons real nice
Not too particular, not too precise
I’m just the world’s ruler it’s paradise

Heard about a place called the U.N.
They say the same thing again and again;
All fear and dread I’ll kill Arabs instead
Well, It reminds me of the men we are going to send.

But times have changed I don’t need the U.N.
When I’m in charge I get what I need;
Not just the French, or Germans, or Iraqis
But that American arrogance on which I feed.

Ruling the world is paradise making the rules is really quite nice
Heaven on earth with weapons adds spice
I’m just the world’s ruler it’s paradise

I like wars with death and quick killin
Plenty of oil wells and lots of new drillin.
A sleek cruise missle and alcohol free beer
Well, good god Almighty I was chosen to steer.

For ruling the world is paradise
Makin’ the rules is virtue not vice
Worth every damn bit of sacrifice
To be the world’s ruler is paradise
To be the the world’s ruler it’s paradise
I’m just the world’s ruler it’s paradise

I like wars with death and quick killin
Plenty of oil wells and lots of new drillin.
A sleek cruise missle and alcohol free beer
Well, good god Almighty I was chosen to steer.

Based on Jimmy Buffett’s “Cheeseburger In Paradise”
Do you think these things are clues?